7/01
Visiting Robyn at school, everyone gets a little too drunk at one of the frats, and suddenly I am not sure where I am. I am along a long road with frat houses and no trees, and the road seems to not be connected to any other road, any other town, any other place, as though it exists only by itself. To put it mildly, I am lost. I am lost, I am not from around here, I have lost the only person I know in this place, and I am drunk, but not impaired in any way other than the realization I am much stupider than usual. I sit down on a curb by some bushes and wait for Robyn to walk by, but there is no one out but me. It is cold but not wintertime, and my jacket is not doing enough.
A chick with purple hair walks by and asks me where I’m going, and I tell her I don’t know. I cannot tell if she looks familiar or that I’m hoping she looks familiar, so I won’t be so alone. We talk for a little bit, and I explain that I’m visiting a friend, and her eyes light up. “Oh, I know Robyn!” she says. “She lives on my hall. She’s probably playing pong, don’t worry about it. You can come back with me and you’ll hear when she comes in and meet up with her. Don’t worry about it. But let’s go, okay? It’s fucking freezing out here.”
I don’t know how we get back from The Road That Nothing Built to civilization, but we do, and we enter a brick building that is a giant square from the outside. We walk up to the top floor and there are only two rooms there, for some reason, and walking into this purple-haired girl’s room, which is small, I know the other can’t be that big either. I try not to think about the logic of it because it hurts my head.
The purple-haired girl tries to take off her eye make-up, but ends up ripping out a bunch of her eyelashes before laughing and giving up. She is wearing a pink camisole and little shorts covered in pink flowers, and I am in a white tee shirt and blue underwear on her floor, my head against a large red pillow, as we listen to some music. Slowly, she lowers herself to the floor, and kisses my breasts. We make out for a little bit, before she gets back into her bed, and takes my hand and I go with her.
When we are done, and very satisfied, we sleep. We do not hear Robyn get back.
In the morning, purple-hair chick is brushing her teeth as I wake up, looking at me through a mirror reflection. “Your neck is all bruises,” she warns, and my hand goes up instinctively to check, and I flush, a little embarrassed. It has snowed since we came in from the cold, and I feel like I should be wearing layers even though in this little brick-walled room I am toasty. I throw my legs out from under the covers and walk to the bathroom to meet her, and we kiss for a few seconds. “Was that your first time?” she asks as I brush my hair. I give some sort of non-committal answer and she laughs because she knows that means yes, and I smile in spite of myself. “Well, you weren’t half-bad,” she teases as I set down the brush and search for my jeans. I don’t know what to say to her, because while I remember very little of what we actually did, I also know that I had two orgasms and that ain’t bad. I opt to say very little.
I am almost ready to leave, am just putting on my bra, when she comes over and we start all over again, and this time I do remember where my hands have been, where her mouth met mine, the frustrated panting followed by the slow release of a moan. And this time, as we both roll out of bed, as I am berating myself for being sexually frustrated and easily seduced, she says “God this campus could use more lesbians.” I say too quickly, “I’m not a lesbian.” She gives me a look. “Honey, let’s not lie to ourselves,” she says, as she leans in and kisses me, running one hand through my hair while the other cups my cunt. She pulls back. “We have sex with women.” And I don’t know what to say to that, because she’s right, but I like men, don’t I? And I don’t know, so I get my clothes back on, again, and thank her for her hospitality, and walk exactly six feet to Robyn’s room, where she is hungover and falling in-and-out of sleep, and I lie on the floor, staring at the ceiling, trying to sleep, when I wake up.
